Today I caught myself smiling for no reason... then I realized I was thinking about you...♥
yep!
him. ♥
Love. That is my word of the day. Love. No, not just any kind of Love... Love. That. Lasts.
"Head-over-Heels, His-n-Hers towels, lets-grow-old together L.O.V.E."-as quoted on "how to lose a guy in ten days."
●The kind when you realize that having success in it "requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." -Mignon McLaughlin. Always putting that person first. Communicating, listening, expressing, understanding, appreciating, giving. Words on my mind. Nourishing your spiritual and emotional sides together. Bringing out the best in each other. Realizing your not perfect. Where having charity and forgiving each other is essential. Laughing alot. Staying positive. Having an eternal perspective. Bearing one another's burdens. Rebuilding your relationship everyday, and continually polishing that spark! You're my best friend, grow old along with me, kind of Love. That's what I'm talkin' about.
Click some 'ear candy' to listen to while you browse!
"I always just envisioned the right one being someone I could see myself growing old with." -as quoted on "the wedding singer"
The kind where "two old people, without a thing... sit side by side on that front porch swing... just livin' on love" -Alan Jackson
The "never get too old to call her baby" kind of Love. -Lee Brice
awe.
awe.
●Let me tell you a little something about him... He listens. Among many other qualities, that was one of the first things that steered me to him. We all have that need. The need of a listening ear. The need to express how we are feeling to someone who doesn't try to correct us, or fix us. He just listens, he holds me, listens some more, and understands. I am able to pour out my heart to him without being told what i should have done or need to do. It's amazing the freedom and comfort i feel from his willingness to do that for me. It actually allows me to be able to find the solutions for myself when I have someone to spill it all out too. Thank you sweetheart.
how did i get so lucky?
●I want to be more like him, and since his great example to me has been on my mind today, I've been searching and mental note taking - found some lovely gems, or 'brain candy' on the subject of love, listening and validation. - Most of them i found in a book called "Love That Lasts" by Gary and Joy Lundberg - amazing couple! This is an awesome book and I can't help but share some of it.
The Universal Need...
"I am of worth, my feelings matter, and someone really cares about me... We often think that caring is demonstrated by fixing the other person's problems..." (this is where validation comes in)
Validation: It is the ability to walk with another person emotionally without trying to change his or her direction.
I DO NOT HAVE THE POWER TO MAKE ANYTHING ALL BETTER FOR ANYONE ELSE. I CAN OFFER MY HELP, BUT I CAN'T MAKE IT ALL BETTER.
simple yet powerful.
Rules of Validation: LISTEN, LISTEN, LISTEN, and UNDERSTAND.
~Give your full attention. Listen to the emotions being expressed. Listen to the needs being expressed. And just do the best you can to see their perspective.~
The Three-Pronged Approach: I feel (an emotion) about (an event) and I need .
"The more you listen and ask questions when your spouse is talking, the more you will understand the meaning of his or her words and the closer your relationship will become" -love that lasts
"If you avoid listening because you think you have to make everything all better, remember, you don't need to do anything but listen and do the best you can to understand. That's it. That's what any friend needs - especially your best friend." -love that lasts
"Since friendship is based on acceptance, eliminate any notion that you are going to change your mate - you can't. True friends don't try... Your responsibility is to be the better person yourself... learn to take care of your own goals..." -love that lasts
●Duly Noted: Words. the right and wrong kind: Get rid of the question "why?" (example: "Why did you do that?"). You don't need to be right, that's not the goal. Avoid using "you." ("you did this, you make me so...!") Replace with "I feel." Never say "You shouldn't feel this way." Use "and" instead of "but."...(example: "You are the most important person in my life, (and or but) I need to feel like I'm the most important person in your life.") Which one sounds better?
●Note that you do not change or discount your own beliefs, feelings, or experiences. You just get out of yourself for a while and into their shoes.
"Burdens are so much easier to bear when you are appreciated and feel loved by your mate. Sometimes it takes so little to put the balance back into the relationship. Listening to your spouse without being judgmental or critical can be one of the most effective ways you can help him or her feel like the number one person in your life." -love that lasts
"Remember to use the power of touch. Hug when you greet each other... Share a kiss that lasts longer than the perverbial peck." -love that lasts
"If you will make your first concern the comfort, the well-being, and the happiness of your companion, sublimating any personal concern to that loftier goal, you will be happy, and your marriage will go on through eternity." -Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley
"The path of true love is only wide enough for two." -Hal Boyle
Brain Note/self questions: What is my Focus? What do i treasure most? Who is my best friend?
the gospel. children. family.
him. always him. ♥
Henry Ford said it best: "He is your best friend who brings out the best that is in you."
He is someone who accepts me for who I am. Exactly me. Someone I can talk to about anything. Someone I can have fun with. Someone who really cares about me. Someone I can trust.
he is that someone.♥
●Being in love and wanting to grow old with my best friend is such a blessing. But knowing I get to spend Forever with him is the best gift of all. Keeping it this way will require us to always keep each other at the top of our lists. ~ Your #1 on my list babe! And because I feel that I'm number one in your eyes, I feel like I can make it through anything. I will always love you, 'til we are old, wrinkly, gray and beyond!
Don't miss out on this little doozy. I love it because there is so much love, compassion, selflessness and friendship felt. This is the kind of marriage I hope to have. It is a beautiful lil love story. It touched my heart and funny bone!
Oh, and grab a tissue...
[*You might have to watch it a few times to get the right feel for this couple, cuz the animation kind of throw's you off. But it's worth it.]
Chris, if being married to you is like having a colored telivision set, i'll never go back to black and white. *wink*
● If you made it this far down the post, thanks for enduring my random thinking and obsessive note taking :)
xo, milly
3 comments:
i am so happy for you Camille--what great thoughts! that book seems really good--i love reading and talking about relationships. i'm glad that you are so happy!
You are so cute! When is the big day?
You are so cute Camille! Can I just tell you I love reading your blog. I am so happy for you, you seem so happy!
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