[light]

I was looking through some old photo's and when I came across this one I couldn't hold back the tears. It was taken in 2009 - at a time when I was searching for Light. Back then I called this photo ---"Light at the end of the tunnel." As I stared pondering it's meaning to me, feelings of both sadness and joy filled my soul.

Oh, how I miss this Little girl. I know I still have her and she is still my little girl - and is such a blessing to me - but she is not so Little anymore. I feel like I am trying to raise a teenager in a 5 year old body. She is growing and changing so fast - my heart is not ready. Oh how I love being her mom, but my soul feels drained at times.

As I look at this photo, I realize it has more meaning to me than I originally thought. I looked at her sweet face looking up into the sky, my mind immediately thought of the quote from Pres. Monson: "It is better to look up." I use to call this photo "Light at the end of the tunnel" but now I realize that I don't have to wait until the end. I can always find the Light as long as I look up.

What I went through Then, and what I'm going through Now ----
Different.
How I got through what I did back Then, and how I'm getting through what I am Now ----
Same.

But....
With the realization that nothing ever goes away until I have learned all that I need to from it.
With different experiences comes knowledge and strength. Even though I have to rediscover it within myself from time to time.

"Someday everything will make perfect sense. So, for now, laugh at the confusion, smile through the tears and keep reminding yourself that everything happens for a reason."

I loved this photo then, but now I love it even more.